One recent evening I was too lazy to grab the remote in order to fast forward through all those cumbersome commercials, so I sat through…I don’t know… perhaps it was a DirecTV or a unisex deodorant or maybe an alternative soft drink commercial featuring the members of The Black Eyed Peas. Well two of them. So there’s will.i.am (who I know because I have a crush on his song “It’s A New Day” and he was a great panel member on Real Time with Bill Maher) and there’s the chick with the smokin’ hot body and unfortunate face…you know…whatshername. But what about the tall Asian and/or Latino guy? What’s up with him? He get’s barely half a second of screen time in the commercial. And I’m sure it’s always been that way. I bet he calls his mom to tell her his band is going to be playing on the MTV Music Awards. Well Mom gets all excited. She calls all her friends to brag. The night of the big show, she makes sure Grandma has a good view of the television set and that the twins got their homework done early, and they all sit down to watch it together. But the camera never pans to him. Not even once. He runs behind whatshername a few times, but really, he’s just a blur. His mom tells him that the band’s performance was very good (whatshername could have dressed a little less provocatively), and that they especially enjoyed his…energy. But he knows. He knows he’ll never be a stand out. He doesn’t have the same political clout as will.i.am or sex appeal as the dude with the boobs. But what other choice does he have? He was an art history major, this is as good as it’s going to get for him. So he just keeps running back and forth in the background. That makes me profoundly sad. Sadder than sad.
This concludes this installment of “Gretchen Feels Really Strongly About Something She Knows Nothing About.”
Postscript:
In searching for an image for this installment of “Gretchen Feels Really Strongly About Something She Knows Nothing About,” I found out that there is a fourth member of The Black Eyed Peas. I was confused and embarrassed, but mostly confused. I seriously considered abandoning the post, but then realized that it only reinforced the fact that I know absolutely nothing about The Black Eyed Peas. Now I don’t know if I feel sorrier for, this forgotten member or the art history major. Let’s just say both. Let’s just say both.
You bet your sweet ass I was an art history major,
gretch
2 comments:
I lurve you.
Its not all gloom, the one name Apl (the one with the mohawk) is a huge hero to the philipino community. In his home town they gave him his key to the city and "apl day".
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