Wednesday's Child is Full of Woe

I forgot to call my nephew on his birthday yesterday. OK, he's three (and ONE DAY) but that doesn't mitigate the seriousness of this transgression. I'm drenched in shame. Awash in regret. And there is nothing to be done now except assign blame.

First, my actual excuses.

• I am not working currently, and so all my days feel like Saturdays. It's true. I don't know what the date is, and when I do, it doesn't seem to mean anything.
• I ordered his present on Saturday, and I think my brain thought it was done with its responsibilities. Yes, I ordered it too late to arrive on time, what's your point?
• I was recently widowed, will that work here? I'm trying it everywhere.
  

Now, my sisters and I routinely wonder about whether or not our father will remember our birthdays, let alone those of his grandchildren, and I'm sorry that neither of my sisters saw fit to save me from joining his particular club. The boy's mother, sure, can be forgiven. It's a delicate thing, isn't it, to call one that one is sure forgot another's birthday. Mustn't jump the gun. But this should be about the children. The child deserves better. Why, at the tender age of three, must he learn that his Titi Jenny is a complete and total loser? Never mind that it's true. Couldn't the village band together this once and preserve his innocence for just a little longer? My other sister, my nephew's Titi Elena, is gratifyingly taking on much of the blame. I accept that, though it doesn't help with the totality of my anguish over this. It's like putting a cherry on a shit sundae. I appreciate the gesture, but it still tastes like shit.

I now must Implement a Plan. One that ensures (ENSURES, I say!) that this sort of thing never happens again. I'm saved only by wee James' age and the hope that I live long enough to make up for this somehow. I'm sorry it had to be him, but I've hit my rock bottom. I will purchase a birthday calendar that I can hang here by the desk, and will sign up for those computerized reminder services that I've eschewed until now. This I swear: NO BIRTHDAY SHALL PASS WITHOUT A TIMELY GREETING FROM TITI JENNY, EARLY ON THE DAY IN QUESTION.

Titi Jenny